Uncategorized – Page 31 – SeasonedSistah

Happy One-Year Blogging Anniversary to ME

This past year, beginning with writing the first post for this blog, I started down the path of a life-changing journey. In search of peace, love, and happiness” I stepped out of my comfort zone to look for ME.

As I walked this path, I paused along the way to

Publish a Weekly Blog Post
Socialize on Facebook
Practice Yoga
Attend Aqua Zumba Classes
Transition from Windows PC to Apple Mac Software
Meditate Daily
Express Gratitude
Pray and Praise God
Make Positive Affirmations
Perform Random Acts of Kindness

In 2014, I want to continue to release the “unnecessary burdens” of

Negativity
Fear
Self-Judgment
Anger
Low Self-Esteem
Gossip

These things block ME from being the person God created.

In this second year of blogging, I will write about MY continued journey to create a peaceful, loving, and happy life through:

Self-Awareness – “As you become more clear about who you really are you’ll be better able to decide what is best for you – the first time around.” (Oprah Winfrey)
Self-Care – “Our bodies are our gardens to which our wills are gardeners.” (William Shakespeare)
Self-Acceptance – “You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself. The only person who can pull me down I, myself, and I’m not going to let myself pull me down anymore.” (C. JoyBell)

I am a work-in-progress. I grow stronger and wiser each day. I no longer regret what happened in the past or fear what may happen in the future; Moment-by-Moment, I choose to live in the Present. For, this is the only timeframe within MY control.

Sometimes You Just Gotta Rant!!!

Since, the “texting in the movie theater shooting last week,” I have been ANGRY. Wanting to COMPLAIN loudly. After a while, Hubby tuned me out. Frustrated!!I Gotta Rant? Sorry, loyal blog followers. I need to dump a little negativity on you this week.

Hear Me Rant!!! We Need Better Gun Control Laws

Too many guns in the hands of criminals, YES.

But, also too many “concealed weapons” in the hands of supposedly “law-abiding people.”

Law abiding people acting as judge, jury and executioner.

Law abiding people who, apparently, believe the “license to carry a weapon” anoints them to the level of judge, jury and executioner.

This is a health and safety issue for all of us.

Did you know that “554 people have been killed since May 2007 by people licensed to carry concealed weapons in incidents that did not involve self-defense.”

Allow Me Rant About Five!!

Rant #1: 71-year-old, retired police officer felt entitled to “draw his “concealed weapon” to shoot and kill” Chad Oulson, a 43-year-old father and husband in a movie theater who “refused to stop texting” and “responded to the request to stop texting by throwing popcorn.” (January 2014 – Florida)

Rant #2: Renisha McBride, 19-years-old, injured and dazed following an early morning car accident in a Detroit suburb. Seeking help, she went to a nearby home, knocked on the door and was met with a gunshot wound to the head. The homeowner alleged she was an intruder. Yet, he failed to call 911 prior to shooting her through a locked screen door. And, then left her to die on the front porch without calling 911. (December 2013, Michigan)

Rant #3: Jordan Russell Davis, 17-years-old sitting in a parked SUV at a gas station with friends was shot and killed. The shooter, 45-years old, was angered by the loud music the young men were listening to. When they failed to turn the music off, he randomly fired shots into the vehicle killing Jordan. (November 2013, Florida)

Rant #4: Darius Simmons, 13-years old, shot and killed by a 76-year-old neighbor who suspected Darius had broken into his home and stolen weapons. As Darius mother stood helplessly by on her front porch, the neighbor first pointed the gun at her; and, then pointed the gun at Darius and shot him in the chest. (July 2013, Wisconsin)

Rant #5: Seventeen-year-old, Travon Benjamin Martin, was shot and killed while walking unarmed in a gated community by a neighborhood watch captain. Calling 911, to report seeing a “suspicious person,” he ignored instructions not to get out of the car and proceeded to follow Travon and killed him. (February 2012, Florida)

Closing Rant

I join the many other Americans who believe stricter gun control laws and better mental health restrictions are needed to address this epidemic. It is unthinkable, in this day and age; that people feel it is okay to bear arms and act as though still live back in the days of the Wild, Wild West.

Black Travelers

In honor of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., I chose to re-publish this post from last year where I shared one of my personal experiences, as an elder, who lived through Jim Crow. Let us not forget the suffering and indignities Dr. King and other civil rights activists were subjected to in the fight for fair and equal treatment in this country.

“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and

narrow-mindedness.” – Mark Twain

One of my happiest childhood memories were family summer vacations. Every year, we traveled by car from Chicago to my parents’ hometown in Coahoma, Mississippi. Members of our closely-knit extended family of aunts, uncles, and cousins joined us for this thirteen-hour drive. We were journeying home, traveling by night, in a caravan of three to four cars through the states of Illinois, Kentucky, Tennessee, and Mississippi staying “visibly” connected to each car in the caravan along the way. Why, because of the Jim Crow Laws in the 1950s.

Reports of racial harassment and intimidation of black people while traveling were common.
Threats of physical harm, especially vulnerable, were cars with license plates from “up north.”

As a black traveler, you understood the restrictions and limitations under Jim Crow. Black travelers were:

prohibited from using public facilities — water fountains and bathrooms.
barred from eating in restaurants or ordering food to go.
banned from staying in hotels and motels.

The children never questioned. The adults never complained. Why? This was our reality. We bypassed Jim Crow and survived.

We carried our supply of water, soda, paper plates/cups, napkins and plastic silverware.
We ate food prepared, with love, by my mother and the other women travelers.
We dined on homemade rolls, deep-fried pork chops and southern deep-fried chicken.
We consumed large bowls of macaroni and potato salad chilled on ice in coolers.
We lunched on ham, bologna and/or salami, placed between slices of white bread lavishly splattered with mustard and wrapped in tinfoil. Along with the sandwich, potato chips, an apple, and cookies were packed in individual small brown paper bags.
We devoured slices of sweet potato pie, pound cake, coconut cake, and my favorite at the time, caramel cake.

As for using the bathroom, we carried a supply of toilet tissue, found an isolated area adjacent to the highway and the person would relieve themselves in the bushes. However, there were times when the only option for privacy was to have someone stand in front of you.

Many of the inconveniences experienced by my family as black travelers might have been avoided had they known about “The Negro Motorist Green Book: An International Travel Guide.” The Green Book was published by the Victor H. Green & Company annually from 1936 until 1964 when the Civil Rights Law was enacted. An 80-page publication, it was considered as the black man’s guide to traveling.

The purpose of the Green Book is best described by the following statement from the publication:

“With the introduction of this travel guide in 1936, it has been our idea to give the Negro traveler information that will keep him from running into difficulties, embarrassments and to make his trips more enjoyable. For many travelers, many places are not available, even though they may have the price, and any traveler to whom they are not available, is thereby faced with many and sometimes difficult problems. The Negro traveler’s inconveniences are many and they are increasing because today so many more are traveling, individually and in groups. There will be a day sometime in the near future when this guide will not have to be published. That is when we as a race will have equal opportunities and privileges in the United States. The Green Book with its list of hotels, boarding houses, restaurants, beauty shops, barber shops and various other services can most certainly help solve your travel problems.”

In a 2010, New York Times article entitled, “The Open Road Wasn’t Quite Open to All,” Lonnie Bunch, director of the Smithsonian National Museum of African-American History and Culture stated:

“The lack of knowledge about the Green Book also tells us about the lack of knowledge many Americans now have on how segregation really worked – how it had impacts dramatic and impacts small. But all the impacts hurt. The more people understand that through the Green Book, the more they’ll understand how things have changed. “

What a blessing it was to travel black, as a child, unaware of the Jim Crow limitations and restrictions. Even though Jim Crow Laws are no longer in existence, my early experiences as a black traveler shaped how I view traveling by car today. My phobia, as an adult, is the emotional and mental stress I may have to cope with as a black traveler on the highway.

Family: The Best Holiday Gift, Part 2 – Christmas 2013

Family: The Best Holiday Gift, Part 1 – Thanksgiving 2013

In last week’s post, I learned a valuable lesson; “You can’t have a better tomorrow if you’re always thinking about yesterday.” (Unknown).

No doubt, I am stepping outside the boundaries of a “writer’s privilege;” but, the reverse order of this quote provides a better explanation of what happened in my case.

“Thinking about yesterday,” I broke a more than fifty-three year family tradition of spending Thanksgiving with our Children. Guided by the FEAR of a replay from the previous year, I chose to stay in warm Florida rather than expose my compromised immune system and serious lung condition to cold Wisconsin.

“You can’t have a better tomorrow.” Why? In choosing to make a decision about tomorrow, I relied on FEAR and ignored the commonly held theory that FEAR is: False Evidence Appearing Real. This view was validated when I was admitted to the hospital in warm Florida for seven days, including Thanksgiving Day, with both an immune system problem and lung condition.

As it turned out, even though I didn’t spend Thanksgiving with family, I found HAPPINESS in the PRESENT” through unexpected Gifts.

Family: The Best Holiday Gift, Part 2

What a beautiful Gift for ME and Hubby over the Christmas Holidays in the PRESENCE of the special people who bring happiness into MY Space on a daily basis. I am strengthened throughout the year, as the receiver, of their Gifts of encouragement, unconditional love, and support.

MY IPAD Amateur Photo Gallery

Hoping to avoid having to answer over-and-over again, “What are we eating?” I prepared the week’s menu so everyone knew what to expect:

Christmas 2013 Menu

I was able to capture the images below of my Gifts on an IPAD camera during their seven-day visit. While, the photos may not be appealing to the eye, they will join the other memorable treasures of past family gatherings. For, I truly believe, “memories are a way of holding on to the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose.” (Unknown)

Hubby and Youngest Granddaughter –His Little Cupcake

Younger and Elder Daughters

Son and His Five-Year-Old Daughter (AKA, Cupcake)

Nephew/Surrogate Son

Son-In-Law Married to Elder Daughter

Eldest Grandson (24-years-old) and Baby Sister

Granddaughter (22-years-old) and Grandson (17-Years-Old)

Youngest Grandson (13-years-old)

Cupcake said, “I got this Banana Pudding!!

The Only One that Still Believes in Santa

Last Day – Quality Time with Two Granddaughters – Pedi/Mani

Visit Over – ME and MY Quality Time

Closing this week’s post, with the memorable family quotes I choose to embrace:

“Having someone to love is a family. Having a place to go is a home. Having both is a blessing.” (Donna Hedges)
“If the family were a fruit, it would be an orange, a circle of sections, held together but separable – each segment distinct.” (Letty Cottin Pogrebin)
“What greater thing is there for human souls than to feel that they are joined for life – to be with each other in silent unspeakable memories.” (George Eliot)
“I sustain myself with the love of family.” (Maya Angelou)
“Spending time with the ones who are dear to you is like being in a dream is it not?” (Sakura Tsukuba, Land of the Blindfolded, Vol. 3)

Family: The Best Holiday Gift – Part 1, Thanksgiving

With the exception of Thanksgiving 2013, since 1960 Hubby and I have been blessed to spend every Thanksgiving and Christmas with Our Children. When they left Our Nest, coming together on these two holidays was the Gift, I looked forward to receiving each year.

When Hubby and I retired three years ago and moved to Florida, we continued to have Thanksgiving at Elder Daughter’s home in Milwaukee; and, the Children and Grands came to Our Home in Florida for Christmas. That is until 2013.

Unfortunately, shortly after returning from Our Thanksgiving visit to Wisconsin in 2012, I was hit with the pneumonia virus. Hubby, the Children and I felt it was not wise to expose MY compromised immune system and serious lung condition to the harsh Wisconsin winter weather. After much deliberation, I chose to stay in Florida.

Apparently, MY compromised immune system and serious lung condition didn’t agree with this decision.

For over seven days during Thanksgiving 2013, I was in the hospital with a very serious case of bronchitis.

While I didn’t share the 2013 Thanksgiving meal with MY Children and Grands; I found HAPPINESS in the PRESENT.

Through Grace, for Thanksgiving 2013, I received a long-awaited Gift. The Daughters telephoned to say, “It’s time we learned how to prepare the traditional family holiday dinners.”

The night before Thanksgiving with the two of them in the Eldest Daughter’s kitchen and I, resting comfortably in my hospital bed, via IPhone I shared the step-by-step instructions for preparing MY MAMA’s corn bread dressing, turnip/mustard/collard greens, as well as Patti LaBelle’s Mac and Cheese recipe.

What a Great Gift to ME. The night before Christmas, I sat quietly at the kitchen island in MY kitchen enjoying a glass (actually, several) of Chardonnay while the Daughters prepared the entire Christmas Dinner.

Grateful, Thankful, Blessed. Finally, the family holiday traditional dinner was embraced and transferred to the next generation.

Next week, I look forward to sharing, “Family, The Best Holiday Gift – Part 2, Christmas 2013.” Hope you will join me.

Five Important Lessons

Five Important Lessons.

This is a reblog that really resonated with me. Thank you “A Daily Post” for sharing.

Toy I Wanted For Christmas — Out of MAMA’s Reach

Toy I Wanted

More than sixty years ago, for months leading up to Christmas; I, along with three of my best girlfriends, imagined, dreamed and talked about getting a kid-sized doll on Christmas Day.

Out of MAMA’s Reach

I still recall the tears shed those many years ago when MAMA said I wouldn’t get anything for Christmas. Instead Kris Kringle was bringing my presents on New Year’s Day. She explained the money set aside for Christmas gifts would buy things for the new baby on the way. Mind you, it wasn’t her new baby.

Earlier in the year MAMA extended a helping hand to a niece who had recently separated from her husband. Pregnant with two toddlers, she moved into our four-room apartment. Our family of two increased to five. And, on December 11, the new baby boy arrived. Now, we were a family of six. The sole source of income for the entire household was MAMA’s salary. MAMA and I, a family of two, had struggled for years to survive on the meager wages she earned. But, she found ways to stretch the money to provide room and board for family members in need of help.

On Christmas Day my three girlfriends got kid-sized dolls. I was a little jealous and my friends tried to cheer ME up saying, “Kris Kringle will bring your doll next week.”

The Greatest Gift

On January 1, New Year’s Day, Kris Kringle arrived with a small-sized baby doll and other toys. While I didn’t get the kid-sized doll, I was gifted with two toddlers to play with and a new baby boy to hug and cuddle.

MY friends after a while tired of the kid-sized dolls. They visited almost everyday to play with ME and MY three little cousins,

I am grateful to MAMA for teaching ME at an early age to value the “Gift of Giving.” The quality of MY life is enhanced when I can make a difference in the lives of others.

Five of MY Favorite Gift of Giving Quotes

“No one has ever become poor by giving.” (Anne Frank)
“Happiness. …consists in giving, and in serving others.” (Henry Drummond)
“When you learn, teach. When you get, give.” (Maya Angelou)
“No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of another.” (Charles Dickens)
“We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give.” (Winston Churchill)

New Blog

Clarifying information on the Affordable Health Care Law.

A GRATEFUL FIVE-YEAR BREAST CANCER SURVIVOR – PART 2

INTRODUCTION

I designated October as the month to read everything MY 70-year-old brain could absorb on Breast Cancer. Also, the goal was to write a four-part series about MY five-year journey as a Survivor.

Relying on Google searches, I visited Breast Cancer:

Organizations
Personal Blogs
Support Groups Online
Support Groups for Family
Forums and Discussion Groups

But, before I could finish Part 2 of the series, a bout of bronchitis entered MY space and gained control. For almost three weeks, I was totally out of commission. But thanks to an excellent primary care physician, nebulizer inhalations, antibiotics, and cough medicine; I am bronchitis-free, feeling great, and ready to complete what I started.

###########

PART 2 – SURVIVING AND OVERCOMING BREAST CANCER

In the beginning of my Breast Cancer journey, I was frustrated, depressed, anxious, fearful and just plain angry.

Without warning, this “unwelcome” and “unfamiliar” condition, Breast Cancer, invaded MY body and changed MY life. There were so many unanswered questions about life expectancy, diagnosis, radiation, and chemotherapy.

Did I really want answers? No, denial and rejection of any topic related to Breast Cancer served as MY safety net. I chose to make Assumptions rather than face Reality.

Assumptions:

MY Five Year Survival Rate for Stage 1 Breast Cancer was 97%.
Stage 1 Breast Cancer was serious but not life threatening.
After five years, Breast Cancer was no longer a risk.

Sadly, for more than five years, I relied on these Assumptions.

But I was left with no choice but to face Reality as I prepared to write this four-part series on Breast Cancer. After reading a number of blogs written by Breast Cancer survivors and caregivers as well as visiting different Breast Cancer organization websites, I confronted —

Reality

American Cancer Society – “The five year survival rate refers to the percentage of patients who live after their cancer is found. Of course, many people live much longer than five years.”
Oncology Practice, Living with Metastatic Breast Cancer: A Global Patient Survey – “Worldwide, one-third of patients who present with early-stage breast cancer will go on to develop metastatic disease.”

Now, I must face the Reality that MY

98% five-year survival rate has ended; and
despite an early diagnosis of Stage 1 Breast Cancer, I may be among the one-third who develops metastatic Stage 4 Breast Cancer.

As I continue down the path of this Breast Cancer journey, I will strive to improve the quality of MY life, on a daily basis, through:

Exercise
Meditation
Pacing
Distractions
Sleep Health
Diet and Nutrition
Massage Therapy
Aromatherapy
Spiritual Growth

I plan to put forth an extra effort to remain optimistic and stay positive in preparing to write Part 3 of this series on metastatic Stage 4 Breast Cancer. It’s a topic that I fear but I no longer will rely on Assumptions to avoid Reality.

Expressing Gratitude for the positive changes in my life after Breast Cancer. Everything happens in accordance with God’s Plan.

Also, Appreciation and Thanks to Amanda, Living in Another Language, for creating the new blog design.

Weekly Wishes #7

Wish is a “desire or hope for something to happen” (Merriam-Webster.com). I write about the failure to fulfill past Wishes because I choose to hold ME accountable for MY failures. Especially, when they are under MY control.

Unfulfilled Wishes Weeks #3, 4 and 6

Since I failed to complete the Wishes below, I added them to MY Wishes for Week #7:

Learning to use the Digital Camera is the only remaining Wish from Week #3 and #4 that remains unfilled. However, it is a work-in-progress; this week, I viewed a number of instructional You Tube videos and reviewed the manual.

I failed to Prepare a Healthy Dessert as Wished for in Week #6. Devoted quite a bit of time looking at a number of recipes to find just the right one; finally, I settled on a Pineapple Upside Down Cake recipe found in one of my cookbooks, “Fantastic Food with Splenda,” by Marlene Koch.

Things “outside-of-my-comfort zone”, I will push to the bottom of MY “mental to do list.” This is the case with Desserts whether healthy or not, I can recall only a few successes; and, the last camera I used was a Kodak Instamatic in the 1970s. Yes, I am on a mission to overcome these challenges. Facing them week after week may open ME up to bringing the “unknown” and “uncomfortable” into my “comfort zone.”

Fulfilled Wishes Week #6

This past week was busy. Despite, the number of things on MY “to do list” and the “scheduled appointments”; I completed the following Wishes:

Viewed instructional YouTube Videos on Canon Digital Camera;
Created a Calendar of Activities: Breast Cancer Awareness;
Posted “A Grateful Five-Year Breast Cancer Survivor; and
Visited and commented on Six Breast Cancer Blogs

I opened MY eyes, looked and learned so much from the Six Breast Cancer Blogs, I visited this week:

Misifusa’s Blog – “Life is about the now, not the past, not the future.” I am inspired, motivated, and uplifted after reading her posts.
I Hate Breast Cancer – “I had just graduated from high school and seen my mom die from metastatic breast cancer. Now I have it. But this isn’t about me – it’s about making a difference for other people.” Reading this blog peaked my interest to learn more about metastatic breast cancer.
Telling Knots – “Empty Promises: If we’re not aware of metastatic breast cancer, we’re not aware….About 30% of people diagnosed with breast cancer at any stage will develop distal metastasis.” Living as a five-year breast cancer survivor unaware of these facts until I started to explore the cancer blogs.
Rethink Breast Cancer – ‘Young women get cancer too – Their concerns are unique. Their needs are distinct and their survival rates are lower than those of older woman.” I plan to share the link to this blog with my young survivor friends. This advocacy and support blog as well as the listing of over 30 books recommended by young breast cancer survivors may be helpful.
The Perks of Having Cancer – “Being a survivor is not all about being cancer free….it is about attitude.” This blogger and her blogger friend have joined together and published a book, “100 Perks of Having Cancer Plus 100 Health Tips for Surviving It.” Ordered the book from Amazon.com; and, I look forward to reading about the “perks” and “tips.”.
Chemobrain…In The Fog – “I was the person with an organized spice cabinet. Today, I may not bring my mail in for three days. Might not open it for another three.” At this blogger’s suggestion, Signed up to with the Army of Women, I want to be a part of their “mission to move beyond a cure to find a way to prevent breast cancer.”

I am Grateful to God that “MY eyes were opened” to review and comment on the Six Breast Cancer Blogs. The lack of knowledge about Breast Cancer is a “self inflicted wound” that could well affect the quality of MY life; and, I choose to become a knowledgeable and informed Breast Cancer Survivor. In the words of Peter Drucker, “Knowledge has to be improved, challenged, and increased constantly, or it vanishes.”

Weekly Wishes #7

In addition to the two Unfulfilled Wishes; I Wish to:

Locate – Additional Breast Cancer Blogs
Visit and Comment on Six Breast Cancer Blogs
Post – “A Grateful Five Year Breast Cancer Survivor” Part 2

October is dedicated to increasing MY awareness of Breast Cancer and sharing MY five-year journey as a Breast Cancer Survivor. Every day, I will express Gratitude to God for His Gift of Life.