SeasonedSistah

Freedom Friday: Week Two – Mindfulness and Meditation

Introduction

Three weeks ago, after reading the book, “You Are Not Your Pain,” by Burch and Penman; I decided to try their 8-Week Mindfulness and Meditation Training Program.

Even though, there were doubts, I embarked on this new journey which, If successful, would add a new self-management option for managing and controlling my 20+ year chronic pain condition.

Week One: Still A Work-In-Progress

When the week ended, I still wasn’t able to, wholeheartedly, buy into the concept to welcome and accept with compassion my physical, mental or emotional pain.

I successfully completed the required reading and medication/mindfulness practices. Although, I experienced different results when faced with:

Mental and Emotional Pain – I wasn’t able to welcome it with compassion and kindness.
Physical Pain – The pain levels appeared to lessen when, without negative judgment, I made the choice to enter stillness, follow the breath, and acknowledge the pain with compassion and soothing words.

Week Two: You Are Not Your Thoughts

The practices this week were twice daily, 10-minute Body Scan and Breathing Anchor Meditations; as well as a Watch The Sky, Habit Releaser.

Body Scan Meditation

After completing twenty-eight (28) meditations, I still cannot warmly welcome and accept mental and emotional pain when it enters my space.

Yet, I did make progress. At least, I think so, given what happened following a recent disagreement with:

Hubby, “What’s wrong?”
Me, “I’m good.”
Hubby, “Why are you just sitting there with your eyes closed?”
Me, silently, “I am breathing deeply trying to welcome and compassionately accept the fact that you are getting on my last nerve.”

By practicing stillness and breathing, I eventually let go of the negative feelings, moved past a stressful moment, and stepped into the present moment stress-free.

A work-in-progress, I remain, as it relates to welcoming mental and physical pain with kindness and compassion. Yet, I am optimistic that further study and meditation practices will open me up to embrace this concept. After all, this is only the second week.

Breathing Anchor Meditations

Reading about and practicing this meditation introduced me to Characteristics of the Doing and Being Modes.

According to the authors of this book, the:

Doing Mode causes you to over think your pain,
Being Mode – allows you to step away from your pain.

I read, re-read, highlighted, and flagged the information shared by the authors on the two different modes. Eventually, I reached the conclusion that I shouldn’t limit this meditation and mindfulness training program, as initially planned, to managing and controlling my chronic pain condition.

This new understanding of the Characteristics of the Doing and Being Modes, led me to expand this training program to delve into some of my anxieties and frustrations as a Breast Cancer Survivor.

Habit Releaser – Watch The Sky

Every day, I looked up at the sky for fifteen or more minutes because, according to the authors:

“Pain and suffering can be likened to the weather, while your awareness can be seen in the sky. Sometimes the weather is wild and wintry. Other times it is calm, clear and sunny. But no matter what happens to the weather, the sky always remain. One of the best way to gain a sense of this simple but profound idea is to simply watch the sky for a while.”

I watched the sky for seven days. One day, while exercising in the pool, I looked up and followed the quarter moon as it moved farther and farther away, finally disappearing.

Other days, I spent watching the sky, at different times and in various setting and, even, captured photos:

I enjoyed watching the different colorations in the sky, the formation of the clouds, and the movement of the quarter moon. After several days, I could see the ever-changing looks of the sky in relationship to my mental, emotional and physical pain.

Conclusion: Self-Awareness

What I know now that I didn’t know before Week Two:

Doing Mode – The realization that I function in the Doing Mode as a breast cancer survivor and need to reset this mindfulness/meditation training program to better manage and control the emotional and mental pain that affects the quality of my life.
Being Mode – Self-analysis leads me to believe that, as a chronic pain survivor, I have lived my life in the Being Mode for a number of years. Continuing this training will either confirm or disprove my self-analysis.

As I move forward on this journey, I plan to document my Doing and Being Mode experiences, past and present, in future posts.

I will be back posting Week 3 of this on January 24. I send a warm thank you to the imanikingblog for hosting Freedom Friday and allowing me to use her platform to document this journey.

Wordless Wednesday – July 15, 2015

Writer’s Quote Wednesday 2015

This week for Writer’s Quote Wednesday 2015, I selected a quote from the renowned Civil Rights Leader, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Freedom Friday – Mindfulness and Meditation Practice

Getting better, but MY INTENTIONS do not always get MY ATTENTION.

Three weeks ago, I committed to writing a weekly post for Freedom Friday, hosted by imaniking, to document my 8-Week journey toward managing and controlling a long-term chronic pain condition through Mindfulness and Meditation Practices.

I successfully completed and posted for Week 1. Even though, I did the reading and meditation/mindfulness practices for Week 2; I will do a repeat and write a post about this experience on Friday, July 17.

Instead of Mindfulness and Meditation Practices, I gave full ATTENTION to family and friends during my mini-vacation to Wisconsin for five days. Everyday, I met face-to-face with friends and family that I, usually, communicate with via E-Mail, Facebook, or telephone.

While I love my new life, as a retiree in Florida, I miss the personal connection with the special people in my life. I enjoyed being with them to:

see their smile,
watch their body language, and
listen quietly while looking into their eyes.

But, the highlight of the vacation was being in the presence of family and friends at our Annual Summer Family/Friend Gathering.

(Photography Credits to Friends, Jane and Cebby)

Cupcake said, “Let’s Get This Party Started.”

IMG_9654sm — The Golfers said, “Let’s Get A Little Putting In.”

IMG_9648bsm — The Young Men said, “Let’s Shoot a Couple of Hoops.”

AviDancing — Avi said, “Look At My Moves.”

AvaMKEDancing — Cupcake, Kertagje and George said, “We Got This Dance Down.”

IMG_9716sm — Lyric said, “Forget the Bouncie House, Watch My Somersault.”

IMG_9671sm — SeasonedSistah2 said, “Talking with Family and Loving It.”

Hubby (White Shirt) said, “Having a Great Time with Family and Friends.”

DamienMKE — Damien said, “I Had Fun, But It’s Time to End This Party.”

CJ said, “I Am Tired and Damien is Right, It’ Time to Rest Up for the Fireworks Tonight.”

Wordless Wednesday: July 1, 2015

Writers Quote Wednesday 2015

This week, for Writers Quote Wednesday 2015, I selected a quote by Maya Angelou.

Freedom Friday: Week One – Mindfulness and Meditation

Reading the book, “You Are Not Your Pain,” prompted me to begin this 8-week journey of trying to manage my chronic pain condition through Mindfulness and Meditation.

Week One

I successfully completed the three required activities for Week One.

1. Twice Daily 10-Minute Body Scan Meditations

I had a difficult time staying fully aware of my breath as it flowed through different parts of my body during the meditations. But after several days, when I experienced emotional or physical pain; I breathed deeply, became aware, and acknowledged the pain with compassion and kindness.

2. Spend A Little Time with Nature, Daily

With temperatures in Orlando reaching the high 90s, I wasn’t able to spend time with nature in the way I had planned —

walks through our local botanical garden; and
sitting quietly by the lake in one of our beautiful county parks.

Upon learning that I was, virtually, housebound because of the summer heat in Florida, imaniking, creator of Freedom Friday, sent me an online portfolio of her beautiful nature photos to view.

3. SPEND ONE HOUR WITH NATURE ON ONE DAY

I spent two hours with nature everyday last week:

Meditating, Conscious Breathing and Being Still, daily, for one hour, before daybreak, while in the presence of nature’s singing birds and rustling tree leaves.
Water Exercising, daily, for one hour, periodically, looking upward at the changing colors of the sky and the ever-moving and billowing clouds.

After completing Week One, I now know that my pain:

is fluid rather than solid; and
should be timely welcomed and accepted with compassion and kindness.

Knowing this has enabled me to better manage and control my pain levels.

I am excited about beginning Week Two and can’t wait to share another new learning experience with you. Back next Friday.

Writers Quote Wednesday 2015

Once again, I send a huge thank you to SilverThreading for hosting Writers Quote Wednesday 2015.

This week in recognition of Black Music Month, I selected the words from a song written by the Father of Gospel Music, Thomas A. Dorsey.

In planning my mother’s funeral back in 1967, I chose to have “Precious Lord Take My Hand” as one of the musical selections. I am among many who have made the same choice.

This song was a favorite of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., and he had requested the beloved and famous gospel singer, Miss Mahalia Jackson, to sing it at his funeral.

Years before Dr. King’s funeral, around 1959, I went to see the movie, “Imitation of Life.” Even as a 15-year-old, I ended up in tears when Miss Jackson began singing “Precious Lord Take My Hand” during one of the lead characters funeral.

When I hear this song it always brings back memories of sad times. Yet it is my favorite gospel song; and, I am still trying to process why.

To give you further insight on Mr. Dorsey’ s music and life, I share this YouTube video. It begins with and oral biography on Mr. Dorsey followed by Miss Yolanda Adams, one of today’s most famous Gospel performers, singing her rendition of “Precious Lord Take My Hand.”

https://youtu.be/W7cWF6Qypxk

Please click here for further biographical information on Mr. Dorsey.

Weekly Photo Challenge – June 19, 2015

Roy G. Biv

Acronym: Made of the first letters of the seven colors of the rainbow: Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Indigo, Violet.

Challenge: One or More Images Containing All Seven Colors.

After checking out the challenge on Friday, I searched through the likely photo albums and couldn’t find one or any combination of photos to meet this challenge.

Then, late last night, I thought of the photos taken on a visit last year to one of the local shopping malls and I was distracted, in a good way, with the 2014 Christmas Decorations.

I think the photos shared touches on all seven colors. Do you agree?

Honoring My Favorite Fathers

Today is Fathers Day and I use this blog to honor two great fathers. Both have been in my life for more than fifty years. Neither is my father, but the way they father has shown me what a true father is.

The #1 Father in my life is the father of my three children. I honor, respect and truly love this man who was only an 18-year-old, high school dropout, when our first child was born.

Pregnant and 17-years old when we married, I believed and trusted him when he said, “I will do all I can to improve my life to give you and our child a better life.” He lived up to this commitment by:

Enlisting in the Armed Forces to make sure there was income and health services for me and our unborn child;
Earning a GED (High School Diploma) to open up better job opportunities after military service; and
Returning to school, after working for five years in the private sector, to earn a Bachelors and Masters Degree at a Top Ten University;

He did these things to ensure our three children were financially secure and their lives were open to better opportunities. But, just as important, he was the hands-on father who:

washed diapers,
ironed school uniforms,
hemmed skirts,
sewed on buttons
cooked meals,
read stories,
attended school conferences, concerts, recitals, games, …
shared dreams,
encouraged goals.

Our children are now middle-aged and have their own families, but they know Dad is there for them, today, as he has been throughout their lives.

The #2 Father in my life is our only son. A middle-child, the only boy, born on Halloween; I, jokingly, said for many years, “I am not sure if he is my trick or treat.” Today, I say without hesitation, “He is my treat,” and “I shout from the highest height that I am proud to call him my son.”

This Father Day, and everyday, I honor this man who is 53-years-old and the single-parent to my 6-year-old granddaughter. By the way, brag time, she graduated from Kindergarten this month:

Parenting is challenging even when there are two people sharing the responsibility. And, I had concerns whether my son could handle single-parenting. Especially, given he had lived most of his life as a bachelor.

I recall the saying, “He’s a chip of the old block” and, like his father he has stepped into the parenting role with ease and confidence.

Teachers, family, friends, professional colleagues, as well as his parents, comment on his hands-on fathering skills. How could we have expected anything else? After all, he has seen hands-on fathering, by his father, throughout his life.