SeasonedSistah

Writing 101, Day Six: A Character-Building Experience

Within the past year, I met two new people. Real, live people whose names I choose not to divulge. Though it is unlikely they will read this post, I am not ready to communicate with them on this level. But, “I do know for sure,” our “acquaintance relationship” will never develop into a “real and trusting friendship,” until we have an honest conversation about what I have shared in this post.

If our eyes met in the Exercise Room at the Y, on a Monday, Wednesday or Friday between 7:30 a.m. and 8:30 a.m., Georgia Hubby and I would share a nod and a brief smile. For three years, Georgia Hubby and I followed this ritual; and I saw no reason to do anything more.

In all honesty, satisfied with the status-quo, I would silently say, “I know who you are,” but, “I really don’t want to know you.” On the surface, Georgia Husband seemed like a nice enough man, but, I had already formed my opinion of him. Based on two things, Georgia Husband is a:

WHITE MALE from GEORGIA with a SOUTHERN ACCENT

Georgia Hubby and My Hubby’s “acquaintance relationship” upgraded a teeny-bit to a “small talk relationship;” and; I eventually entered the “small talk circle.” Late last year, Hubby and Georgia Husband, scheduled a date for us to go out to dinner and meet his wife.

Georgia Wife is petite, barely five-feet tall, probably weighs no more than 120 pounds, still in her forties, and very focused on her career as a health care provider. I was surprised at her striking contrast to Georgia Husband, who is at least 6 feet tall, retired, 69+ years, and a happy house-husband who is quite comfortable in this role. Something, I have rarely, if ever seen.

But, again I couldn’t see Georgia Wife and my relationship going beyond a casual “couples dining out” because she is a:

WHITE FEMALE from GEORGIA with a SOUTHERN ACCENT

As we begin to have deeper conversations with the Georgia Couple other questions arose; politically, Hubby and I are as far to the left as they are to the right.

Perhaps, I can overcome the “differences” when I feel comfortable enough to express that a “difference exist.” Georgia Couple is probably assuming that Hubby and I share their views because we have failed to offer a counter-argument or voice our opinions. Politics, poverty, race, and other social issues on unfair conditions and unequal treatment, are difficult conversations to have. Especially, with those who see things differently.

Summer vacations, as a girl, spent with my grandparents in rural Mississippi was the training ground that taught me to fear WHITE PEOPLE from the SOUTH who spoke with a SOUTHERN ACCENT. Yes, my grandparents were guilty of stereotyping, but their lives were self-programmed to fear based on the inhumane and often vicious attacks against black people in the south during their lifetime.

Compounding this, I lived through a period when scenes like the following were occurring in the south.

Overcoming my stereotypical views of the Georgia Couple will take work. I do not fear them; but, my perception of their past life experiences as well as knowledge of their current beliefs creates a major barrier to our entering into a “real and trusting friendship.”

But, I have not given up. This could very well happen when I decide to have an open and honest conversion with the “Georgia Couple” about my current values and beliefs as well as open up to them about my past life experiences.

Thank You for the Nomination: Very Inspiring Blogger Award

Heartfelt appreciation to Karuna who blogs over at Living Learning and Letting Go for the Very Inspiring Blogger Award nomination. Karuna has opened many interesting and exciting doors for me to enter. Ones that I never knew existed. One example is the post, A Place for Me, where she poses the question, “Why do I want to be in Amritapuri?” she gives us 20+ answers to this question. I urge you to visit Karuna’s blog. It’s an interesting place to go.

Seven Facts About Me

Some may describe me as old; but, I am a SeasonedSistah and view age as merely a number. At the young age of 71, I make a choice everyday to live life to its fullest — letting go of the past, worrying about the future, and focusing on the present moment.
I have health issues, but I choose not to let Breast Cancer, Fibromyalgia, Rheumatoid Arthritis, Peripheral Neuropathy, Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease, or Sleep Apnea define and/or control my life. I choose to follow the path leading to peace, happiness, and love.
I took my first Yoga, Zumba, and Aqua Zumba classes when I was 70-years-old.
I started practicing meditation two years ago — 5:00 a.m., daily is my meditation time.
I have collected over 300 healthy eating cookbooks since 2010. Last year, I tried my first recipe and since then — nothing. I will add this to my bucket list.
Surrounding me in love is my nuclear family — Hubby, Three Middle-Aged Children, Five Beautiful Grandchildren; as well as my large extended family and friends.
For the past six months, I have moved toward a plant-based diet. But, it’s still a work in progress.

My Fifteen Award Blogging Nominees Are:

Writing 101, Day Five: Be Brief

“You discover a letter on a path that affects you deeply. Today, write about this encounter. And your twist? Be as succinct as possible.”

I am a walker.

I follow the same path day in and day out.

I look straight ahead.

I do not look up, down, left or right

I stumbled while walking today.

I looked down and there was a large, tattered brown envelope.

I stopped.

I picked up the envelope.

I opened the envelope.

I was surprised — inside was a lottery ticket with a note attached.

I read the note.

“This winning lottery ticket valued at $300,000,000.00 given to you in appreciation for your family’s acts of kindness to so many people.” Anonymous.

I checked the address on the envelope.

I knew the family.

I asked

What should I do?

I wondered what someone else would do.

What would you do?

Writing 101, Day Four: The Serial Killer

“Write about a loss: something (or someone) that was part of your life, and isn’t there any more.”

I lost Rose, my:

best friend forever (BFF),
next-door neighbor,
sounding board,
book club sister
cancer sister

For the first five years, she was the next door neighbor that I never saw. Occasionally, I would see her husband working in the yard. But, like me, at the end of a work day, Rose found comfort within the walls of her home.

We finally met when a local women’s service club extended an invitation for me to join. After attending three or four meetings, I submitted a membership application.

Rose, the Financial Secretary, processed new applications and noted we were neighbors. Introductions followed, a friendship developed; and, I gratefully received the gift of a life-long friend.

Over the years, our friendship grew stronger and stronger.

Our husbands became friends.

Occasionally, we went on couple vacations.

Shortly, after we became friends Rose and I formed a book club along with three other women. We were five Seasoned Sistahs joined together because of our age, ethnicity, and love for reading books by African-American wordsmiths.

Rose was by my side in 2008, when I was diagnosed with breast cancer.

She was there when I was stricken with a life-threatening illness in 2010.

Shortly after I retired and moved to Florida, Rose was diagnosed with cancer. She was computer challenged and didn’t use Facebook, e-mail, text, or Skype; but, our friendship remained strong with long telephone conversations and snail mail.

A little later, Seasoned Sistahs Book Club dismantled.

Fifteen years after meeting, December 2013 cancer won the battle; and, I lost Rose.

Last week, Hubby and I returned to our home in Wisconsin. As we drove into our cul-de-sac, we saw Rose’s husband working in the yard. The two of us hugged and the tears flowed. Finally, I accepted and realized that Rose is no longer next door.

Rose and I were blessed to have a long-time friendship where we nourished, loved, supported, valued and appreciated each other.

As Oprah says, “This I know for sure”: As I grow older, my circle of girlfriends grows smaller.

Reconnecting with those girlfriends that I have disconnected from is one of my top priorities.

Writing 101, Day Three: Commit to a Writing Practice

“Write about the three most important songs in your life — what do they mean to you?”

The three most important songs in my life bring back early memories of a relationship that many projected wouldn’t last.

It began as puppy love between a boy (13 years old) and a girl (12 years old), which led to a marriage that has lasted for more than fifty-four years.

Song #1 – Rockin Robin by Bobbie Day (1958)

The summer of 1958, I was visiting my grandparents in Mississippi. I was looking forward to rekindling my puppy love friendship.

We were uptown at a restaurant (also called the teenage juke joint) where we hung out. Even though we had been in our puppy love friendship for two summers; I had never danced with him. The jukebox was jumping all evening and up came the hit song of the day, Rockin Robin. He came over and asked for a dance.

We flowed together on the dance floor as if we had danced together for years. I could expect his next move as he led me through the “bop” steps. It was amazing. The few lyrics, I remember are:

“He rocks in the tree top all day long hopping and a singing his song. All the little Jaybirds on Jaybird Street love to hear the robin go tweet-tweet-tweet.”

Song #2 – Mr. Postman by The Marvelettes (1961)

I was 20-years-old, married, with a toddler and young baby, temporarily living with my mother when this song came out. While waiting for Hubby to find housing for us at his new military assignment in Kansas; I checked the mail twice a day hoping to receive a letter from him. Back then, leading up to the Christmas Holidays, mail was delivered twice a day. Most days, I received a letter and there were days when two came. My girlfriends teased me by singing this song; and, I remember a few words:

“Oh yes, wait a minute Mr. Postman look and see if there’s a letter in your bag for me. I have been standing here waiting patiently to see if there’s a letter in your bag for me.”

Song #3 – My Guy by Mary Wells (1964)

Our military traveling was over and we were living in Chicago. Hubby’s nickname is Guy. The lyrics expressed how I felt about My Guy in 1964; and, I feel the same way in 2014″

Nothing you can say can tear me away from my guy. Cause I’m stuck like glue to my guy. I’m sticking to my guy. Like birds of a feather. We stick together. I’m telling’ you from the start. I can’t be torn apart from my guy.”

Puppy Love, Young Love, and Senior Love, wrapped up in one package, what more could I ask for.

At 71-years-old, the lyrics sound a little goofy. But, they were important during this period of my life; and, I am grateful for the past memories.

Writing time for this post was close to the fifteen minutes suggested, but interrupted by several lengthy phone calls.

← Back

Thank you for your response. ✨

Writing 101, Day Two: A Room With a View

Whoopee!!! I just received notification that I can take advantage of an instant transport to wherever I want to go. I selected my favorite vacation spot, an island on the East Coast, surrounded by the Atlantic Ocean, and accessible only by air or ferry.

While this instant transport is faster, I requested a drop-off at the Ferry. For the ferry ride is the high point of my dream vacation.

Even though it is only a 15-20 minute ride, it’s the Atlantic Ocean.

And, so what if the ferry is old, dingy, and lacks the luxuries of a cruise ship, it’s the Atlantic Ocean and I am cruising.

What’s I like about the ferry ride is:

looking up at the bright sky filled with fluffy white clouds,
sitting on the deck with a soft gentle breeze lightly touching my skin,
viewing the vast blue ocean, and
communing quietly in the present moment.

So excited, I am going to my paradise, an island overflowing with:

Happy Vacationers
Friendly Residents
Mom and Pop Businesses
Brightly Painted Victorian Homes
Quaint Bed and Breakfast Dwellings
Cobblestone Streets
Fresh, Fresh Seafood
Beautiful Beaches

Yes, I am going to a serene and tranquil place reminiscent of the days before the large chain-like:

Hotels – Sheraton, Best Western, LaQuinta
Restaurants – McDonald’s, Wendy’s, Pizza Hut
Box Stores – Sam’s, Home Depot, Ikea
Drug Stores – Walgreen’s, CVS
Gas Stations – 7-Eleven, Wawa, BP
Department Stores – WalMart, Target, Macy’s
Supermarkets – Winn Dixie, Krogers, Whole Foods

Looking forward to slowing down, being still, and welcoming the peace, happiness and joy of an Island vacation.

This is my representation of A Room with a View – Martha’s Vineyard.

Writing 101, Day One: Unlock the Mind

Okay, timer is on. I am ready to start this first writing assignment. Feeling in panic-mode, I have to use Hubby’s Dell Laptop and the keyboard is configured entirely different from my MAC laptop. My MAC died. After spending two hours on the phone with two different Apple Support representatives, the MAC is still not operational. The only resolution they came up with was to schedule an appointment for me at the local Apple Store tomorrow.

But, I am determined not to let anything deter me from completing this first day assignment.

I can’t believe this day has gone so badly.

In addition to the dead MAC laptop, the Fibromyalgia and Rheumatoid Arthritis kicked in. Whenever, I over-exert, fail to pace my activities, and venture away from my normal sleeping habits, the body crashes. Pain level, as I write, is an 8 out of 10.

The increased pain levels are related to spending a fabulous long weekend in Wisconsin with family and friends. Our youngest grandson graduated from middle school and the family came together, as we always do, to celebrate the milestones in our lives.

This twenty minute writing, without stopping, to review what I have written is one of the most difficult things I have done. In my early years, I worked as a secretary. My job performance was measured by producing a neat, properly aligned document, absent spelling, punctuation and grammatical errors. Added to this, I had to type the perfect document on a manual typewriter and many times produce five clean carbon copies. Does anyone remember carbon paper? So, typing a line and going back to ensure there are no errors has remained with me over the years. I would not have survived as a secretary without immediately proofreading to ensure accuracy. Correcting with an eraser the original document and 4-5 carbons could ruin the entire day.

OK my 20 minutes are up. I spent too much time writing, correcting, and re-writing the first assignment. This is a problem. Why can’t I randomly write without worry of creating the perfect final document. At least, as perfect as I feel I am capable of producing.

Day Three: Happy Time with The Librarian at Cocoa Beach

In the post last week, I shared Day One and Day Two of Happy Time with The Librarian who came for a four-day visit.

Though, exhausted after a full day of activities on Day Two; I woke up at 5:00 a.m. ready to start Day Three of Happy Time. The Librarian and I were going to Cocoa Beach, despite the rain, forecasted to last the entire day. However, unlike the second day with the two broken umbrellas; we, were prepared with four newly purchased umbrellas — two golf sized and two minis. Pre-Beach Happy Time

Take a look at Hubby’s Photo, one would think he was going to Cocoa Beach. But, Hubby dislikes sand, being in the rain, and should the rain stop — he really, really does not enjoy being in the sun. So, he only agreed to join us breakfast.

I am going to breakfast and afterwards Cocoa Beach. Hubby chose the right attire, but he is just joining us for breakfast. — **Seasoned Sistah2 and Hubby**

Hubby and The Librarian — **Hubby** and **The Librarian**

We had breakfast at one of my favorite restaurants located in Winter Park, Florida a short drive from where we live.

This beautiful sculpture was on display in the park across the street from the restaurant. Since this was the first time I had seen an alphabet sculpture, I wanted to know more. So, I went to GOOGLE IMAGES and keyed-in “alphabet sculptures around the world.” I did not count the number of sculptures created in different sizes, shapes, and materials.

**Alphabet Sculpture – Winter Park, Florida**

Cocoa-Beach Happy Time

Breakfast over. Hubby back home. We are off to Cocoa Beach which is about 60 miles from my home. We arrived. It was still raining. But we, along with a few other brave hearts, were at the beach. Let the day begin.

**Our First Stop – Passerby Offered to Take a Photo**

**A Quick Few Steps in the Water Enough for Me**

**The Librarian Looking Out Over the Ocean Ready to Dip Her Feet In**

**The Librarian wondering, “Where’s the lifeguard?”**

**Heading for the Mai Tiki Bar at End of Pier**

But one, last stop before we go.

**Guess which drink belongs to? (a) The Librarian (b) Seasoned Sistah2** Will let you know in next week’s post

Happy Time: A Friend Visits

Since moving to Florida, our two daughters and grandchildren visit for a week during their spring break in May every year. For the first time in four years, they couldn’t come. My youngest daughter had just been released from the hospital. And, her doctor didn’t want her to travel for a while. Though disappointed, I was happy my eldest daughter decided to stay in Wisconsin to support and spend the spring break with her sister and the grands.

The daughters didn’t come, as planned. Yet, I had a great spring break, filled with an abundance of happiness and joy.

Thanks to The Librarian who has been a great friend for more than fifteen years. Needing a break from Wisconsin’s cold weather, she accepted my invitation to visit. And, I needed someone other than Hubby to spend quality time with. Now, I love the time spent with Hubby. However, I enjoy doing some things that he dislikes and prefers not to do. Although, I did give him the option to join us on any of our planned outings over the next three days. He chose not to commit.

The First Day – Happy Time on the Lanai

The Librarian and I spent the evening on the lanai relaxing, catching up, and enjoying the stillness of a quiet space.

The Second Day – Happy Time at Harry P. Leu Gardens

Though it was raining, we decided to follow the planned agenda — a visit to the Harry P. Leu Gardens. First, I had to pick up the rental car. I showed up promptly at 9:00 a.m., the rental car company’s opening time, with my driver’s license and credit card. I couldn’t rent the car. Because, I didn’t bring a lease, utility bill, or cable bill to show proof of residency. Yet, The Librarian, who lives in Wisconsin could rent the car using only her credit card and driver’s license. She lives two thousand miles away, I live twenty minutes away. It didn’t make sense then. It doesn’t make sense now. But, she rented the car, that I could neither rent nor drive, and we were off to start our day.

Before heading out to Harry P. Leu Gardens, we stopped to pick up a few groceries. Of course, we added several bottles of wine for the evening serenity times on the lanai. Shopping went quickly. Found all the groceries, but we couldn’t find the rental car. We searched aisle after aisle of the parking lot, with no luck. Finally, a man approached us saying he had noticed when we arrived. He took us to the car and we took a photo of the license plate so we wouldn’t lose it again. This was a laughable moment.

Unloaded the groceries at the house and set the GPS to take us where we needed to go. I have lived in this city for more than four years. However, if I venture outside of my very limited driving range, I needed a GPS. The Librarian had never used one; and, I only knew how to use the one in our car. So, the setup wasn’t that easy for us. But, we did it.

At last, we were off to Harry P. Leu Gardens in pouring rain. After driving for more than a half hour, we noticed we were getting farther away from the city. Having visited the Leu Gardens’ website, we knew it was close to the downtown area. So, we pulled over at a gas station and reset the GPS. There was a lot of laughter after discovering, we were going in the wrong direction.

About forty-five minutes later, we arrived at Happy P. Leu Gardens and it was still raining heavily. We had been smart enough to bring two umbrellas from home. When we opened them, they were both broken and virtually useless. But, that didn’t stop us.

At s soon as we entered the Hospitality Building, a very nice receptionist told us the Gardens were closed due to rain. And, to our surprise, there wasn’t an indoor garden as we had expected.

We did spend time browsing around in the Gift Shop; and, I bought two flags for the front yard. I have to decide which to hang first.

We, also, toured the Art Gallery and took photos of the art on display.

The tour, for us, ended on the rear screened-in porch, which overlooks a beautiful lake surrounded by trees. We relaxed in rocking chairs and enjoyed the scenic view.

We didn’t get to tour the Harry P. Leu Gardens, but it was wonderful to spend quality, face-to-face time with a kind and loving friend. I am Grateful to The Librarian for this happy and fun-filled day — mishaps and all.

In the next post, I will write about and share photos on our Third Day – Happy Time at Cocoa Beach.

Want ot Reduce Your Risk of Heart Disease? Move!

understandcancerin60minutes

For women over 30, physical inactivity may be the single greatest contributor to heart disease risk.

The Evidence: Researchers followed 32,154 Australian women in three age groups: those born between 1973-78, 1946-51, and 1921-26. They the applied a math formula called population attributable risk (P.A.R.) that indicates the percentage reduction in diseases that would be achieved in a given population if exposure to a specific risk were eliminated.

The importance of the most common risk factors for heart disease – smoking, high blood pressure, physical activity, and excess weight – varies with age.

For the population under 30, smoking is the greatest contributor to heart disease.In fact, stopping smoking would reduce the risk of heart disease in this group twice as effectively as reducing high body mass index.
For women in their 70s, being physically active would lower the P.A.R. almost three times as much as stopping smoking, and…

View original post 73 more words